What Kids on Bikes Know About Confidence (That Adults Forget)

Ever thought about who doesn’t feel imposter syndrome?

I have.

It’s a kid learning to ride a bike.

I remember clearly when my daughter was learning.

First we started with training wheels... She was wobbly, unsure, and still figuring it out.

 AND she was proud of her effort.

She had one goal in mind: to ride by herself.

She didn’t expect perfection the first time she sat on the bike.

The thought of falling was scary, sure — but she was prepared. 

We knew that momentum mattered, so I bought streamers for the handlebars. Watching them flutter in the wind of her speed was a motivator for her.

Once she got confident with the training wheels, we practiced without them. She did fall.

But she didn’t give up.

When she could comfortably turn in a circle, brake quickly, and slow down gently, she was ready to ride the neighborhood solo.

We can all take a lesson from Lorraine: She was determined. And she gave herself grace.

She didn’t tell herself:

• “I’m not cut out to be a bike rider.”

• “What if the other kids see me learning and laugh?”

• “I’m not as good as the adults riding fast — so forget it.”

When kids learn to ride, you often hear them say “Watch me!”
Even as they wobble and veer side to side.

So why do we feel imposter syndrome?

The term came from a 1978 article, The Impostor Phenomenon in High Achieving Women: Dynamics and Therapeutic Intervention by Pauline Clance and Suzanne Imes. Originally identified among professional women, it’s now recognized as widespread across genders, roles, and ages.

It can show up as:

• Self-doubt: persistent anxiety about your ability or intelligence

• Perfectionism: feeling you must get it exactly right

• Undervaluing yourself: dismissing your contributions and talents

• Attributing success to luck or others: not seeing your own role

• Sabotaging success: unconsciously holding back

• Unrealistic expectations: setting impossibly high bars

• Fear of failure: or fear of being “found out”

• Burnout: trying to prove you're worthy — at any cost

Time to give ourselves some grace

It struck me how different this is from how we treat ourselves as fundraisers, leaders, or entrepreneurs.

We believe we should already know how to:

• Lead our teams productively

• Close that biggest-ever gift

• Run that campaign flawlessly

Even if we’ve never done it exactly that way before.
Even if no one ever trained us.
Even if we’re doing it in a volatile economy.

But here’s the truth: You’re learning. You’re growing. You’re practicing.

You’re allowed to wobble. You’re allowed to get stronger every time.

So here’s your reminder: Give yourself the same grace you’d give a kid learning to ride a bike. You’re building strength and momentum with every push.